the intersection of life and grace

You may have heard that Facebook is improving things again. This time, it isn’t a re-design of your home page; it’s a re-design of your privacy.  I’m not an expert, and I’m certainly not shy about sharing who I am and what I’m about, but I think, this time, Facebook has it wrong.  Why? Two reasons:

1. Facebook didn’t give users an option to protect their information – it’s connect on their terms or delete at least some of your information.
2. Facebook didn’t make a key new change, called “Instant Personalization”, an opt-in feature. Meaning, unless you change the setting yourself, your profile information is available to sites outside Facebook in order to allow them to serve you their own content based on your interests (as presented on Facebook by your likes, connections, personal data, etc.).

In the latest version, Facebook is helping us be more social by sharing the information we each added to our “Info” tab fields with others who have the same information. You may have no objection to this because you added that information to share with your Facebook Friends. It is the premise behind social networking, after all, isn’t it? Find people with whom we have common interests and get to know one another. I think Facebook’s intention is to enhance the social experience, and I agree there may be networking value there but I don’t want it forced on me.

With this update, Facebook is making connections for us by connecting everyone who lists a band, a movie, a book, a school, a town, a workplace, and so on, to one another by default.  Not as a Friend, but through Pages. If it hasn’t happened yet, you’ll likely soon be greeted with a request to convert your profile. It isn’t optional, but you can choose with which pages you’d like to connect. Be aware, the ones you choose to omit with have their corresponding entry deleted from your profile. In addition, there are instances wherein community pages for an entry will be created, but the concept isn’t fully fleshed out. Read Facebook’s description of these connections here.

For example, my “Work” entry stated I’m the owner of Verbitude, which is my DBA name for my writing, coaching and speaking work. When Facebook connected me based on the word Verbitude, it made me wonder, since I concocted it a while back and Google returned 0 results for it at the time.  There are no other employees, so I clicked to find out what happened. The connection? A spoken word and slam poetry event. Really, Facebook, you couldn’t have done better with that? Fun with keywords 101.

Instant Personalization could  seem like a natural extension of the existing “Facebook Connect” feature which allows websites outside Facebook to let you log-in to their site to comment, for example, without creating a site-specific username.  However, Facebook is now making specific sites privy to your information and interactions unless you opt out. There are only a few now, but I expect that to increase since it has huge marketing upside. I don’t mind a website technology that uses my information wisely. I do mind my information being given away without my choosing to do so.

What did I do? I allowed most of my information to be deleted, and will add back those details as I better understand how that works “in everyday use”. It needed updating anyway, most of that info has been there since I joined the site years ago.

There is a lot about the internet many people don’t understand; in my opinion, these changes take advantage of that. My recommendation? Don’t connect online beyond your understanding and comfort level. Take some time to read Facebook’s Terms of Service (you had to agree to them to join, but they change and maybe you didn’t read them in the first place). After that, go to your Facebook account menu, click on privacy, and go through each section to ensure that your information is being used and displayed in a manner you choose.

I haven’t been a good blogger over the course of the past year or so. I’m not going to apologize, though. The events and circumstances that influenced the infrequency are good ones, and I hope in similar you would also drop a hobby for the stuff of life that matters most. After a while of foregoing blogging, however, it’s become something of a quandry how get started once again. So here I am, making this somewhat personal post, shyly hoping to restart my relationship with this medium. Hello, old friend. Hello, also, to anyone who is still subscribed; I’m not sure why you are, but I hope we can have some conversations around the place again.

It’s Good Friday. It’s silent in my house, for the moment – an ever so rare moment. I’m listening to this lack of familiar sounds, and considering my relationship with Jesus in the every day and the extraordinary. I’m a person who actively seeks to find places where ordinary life and God’s grace intersect. I’ve even named this blog according to that pursuit. However, that doesn’t mean I’m always successful at finding those places. I want to be better at it. It’s easier to find grace in the extraordinary sometimes.

A few things on my personal/vocational radar lately:

• I’m still praying for a way to open for me to go to Haiti, as I wrote in my last post. There are some health considerations for me to be successful at serving in such a tropical place, so I’m praying fervently while looking for the opportunity God has for me, whenever and wherever that might come about. I read this post last night, and dreamt about it. Three dreams about serving mothers and children in Haiti. Way will open.
• I’m loving where God has led me in ministry. Right now I’m serving both directly with students through a small group of older high school and college girls at my church, and as a part of the Schenectady City Life team in Hamilton Hill. In both instances, I feel like I’ve come home. In addition, I’m receiving more speaking requests for camp and conferences, which I always enjoy. I’m especially looking forward to my return engagement at TIMS (Teens in Missionary Service), a Central Pennsylvania work camp/summer camp with a missions emphasis, coming up in July. I’ll be speaking in the evening sessions during the week of July 25-31.
• Alongside the ministry opportunities above, I’m being blessed with growth in my own ministry-related consulting business.  I have gotten to work on some fantastic projects, like Simply Youth Ministry’s LIVE curriculum, as well as on-going content development work with Youth Specialties.com. I’m enjoying coaching a few fantastic youth workers in reaching some personal and professional goals [use the contact form here to inquire], and have recently become part of the Life in Student Ministry Mentorship team. Enjoying every minute of it.

That’s a good start at getting reacquainted here. Ask me questions. Comment some topics you’d like to see me address. Let’s look for grace together.

Following months of deliberation by the Federal Trade Commission and rumors throughout the social media marketing world, the FTC this week released it’s “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising” to much buzz.  And, a little panic, I think, for bloggers, twitterers and facebookers who like to talk about their favorite goods and services, wondering what this all might mean for them.

It’s an 81-page document, in rather complex legal-governmental language.  You can read it by clicking here if you like [opens PDF document in a new window].

First, because I’ve fielded a few questions about this from the reviewers I work with on content for clients, I want to define what the new regulations say about bloggers – as I understand it. Disclaimer:  I’m not a lawyer, this isn’t legal advice, and if I learn something new about it, I’ll update this post.

Disclosure

If a company gives you product or money or any other kind of award or compensation in return for your posting about them or their product on your blog, Twitter, Facebook, or any other social networking site, you (the blogger) need to say so clearly.  The consequence for not doing so includes potentially hefty fines, but the report does not delineate what to expect for certain infractions, nor how specifically it will be enforced.

Now, if you review books, resources or music for another outlet, such as YMX, and repost your work on your blog with link attribution (as that site has permitted), you need only be clear that you were given the resource to review for that outlet.  It is pretty clear that product is given to media outlets to review, and you’re (in the case of YMX) reprinting with permission with link attribution.  If you link to your work on another commercial site from your  personal Twitter/Facebook, etc, it seems clear to me that you got something in return for the work (product or  some other consideration).

If you are an affiliate marketer – say for amazon, or referral link prizes, and the like – you need to say so under these new rules.  If you make money on it, you need to say so more clearly than ever.  Here is a good overview of the new guidelines from the corporate marketing point of view.

About this blog

Most reviews on this blog are reprints of my work for hire, primarily at YS/YMX. Those include links back to the original publication page.

A few times publishers or companies have given me books to review, or something to give away. While it was clear enough at the time, I will be more specific about that going forward.  I have never been paid cash for any post on this blog, or anything I’ve posted on my personal social networking accounts.  I intend to add a disclosure page to this blog to acknowledge affiliate relationships so there is no confusion.

All very formal, but I have no problem disclosing this if it prevents confusion on the part of others. Clarity is good, and assuring readers that my thoughts and opinions are my own even if I got a free book is something I’m happy to do.  It’s necessary to help people who research purchases on the internet tell the difference between advertising and customer opinion, because the line had become blurry. Ethics are important.

Now, if we could just get the same kind of clear public disclosure from politicians and lobbyists, I’d be thrilled.

I was going through my email tonight and discovered that a project I wrote for the fine folks at Simply Youth Ministry, for the quarterly Simply All Access program, is now available as a stand alone 4-week small group bible study!  Pretty exciting!

From the description:

It’s no secret that we live in a fast-paced world. And with technology constantly improving, chances are fast-paced living will kick into overdrive. In this 4-week small group study, you’ll help your students examine the problems that stem from busyness, then discover how a life with Jesus can help you avoid burnout.

You can get more information, and a sample lesson from the Busyness series, here.

Apologies for the quiet; it tends to happen whenever there’s a whole lot on my plate.  I will get to the skribit suggestions soon (you can add to the list in the box in the first column to the right, or by clicking here).  But for now, I’ll share a bit of what I’ve been up to these past blog-quiet days.

YM Women

One of the work projects I’ve been most excited about is working with Carrie at YS to support the relaunch of the YM Women initiative on the web.  YM Women is “the ministry of YS that speaks to the personal, professional and spiritual needs of women in youth ministry” – it has existed for a few years, offering some resources and networking opportunities at the NYWC events and by sending resources out via email for use in local small group gatherings.

Last week was the official opening of a dedicated forum section nestled inside the YMX forums (click here to read more), but visible only to females who request access at registration.  Current female YMX forum members need only send me a message and their settings can be quickly updated.

The opening was fun, there’s a great core of users building, and I look forward to seeing the section grow as a resource to women involved in youth ministry.  If you’re a Facebook user, there’s a YMWomen page there to connect with, as well as a YMWomen twitter to follow.

One interesting reaction to the re-launch of YM Women came from some of the men of the YMX forums.  They made the point that men in youth ministry also have unique perspective, challenges and needs they would use some dedicated/private space to discuss.  Some cited known struggles/issues for men in ministry (like pornography), while others raised the much-less-dicussed concern of the feminization of the church/church staff with it’s related potential issues.  I hadn’t considered that in many (likely main line) denominations there could be a situation where a male YP is the only male on the pastoral staff, bringing the possibility of the inverse women in ministry have historically faced.  So, we’ll see what comes of that idea, but I hope it gets traction in a positive way.

Busyness

Irony is one of God’s favorite tools, isn’t it?  I’m working on a writing project on the general subject of busyness during the time period my son’s preparations for college and dorm living need to be completed, and lots of family activity is going on to boot.  He moves into the dorm on Saturday and even as I write is upstairs folding his clothes for packing.  In addition to those preparations, we’ve had a flurry of medical appointments, school shopping trips, the start of Cathie’s swim team practices, and lots more.  This afternoon, Cathie and I will head over to Albany High for her junior (!) orientation the primary purpose of which is advertised to be school pictures, IDs, locker assignments, and probably some rule stating as well.

Of course, none of it fits into my preferred “batch the trips” mode, and yesterday allowed me the frustrating privilege of driving 50 miles to and from these various necessary stops but never getting more than 5 miles from my house.  Mind-boggling.

David Crowder*Band Review

One extremely fun assignment in the past week was the opportunity to review the freshly released Remedy Club Tour CD/DVD set from David Crowder*Band.  A full-length live concert, a complete audio recording of the same concert, and some fantastic bonus features (like learning each part of the song from the musicians in the band, and having the ability to activate chord & lyric subtitles for the concert to play and sing along) made it a fun evening watching with Tim and Cathie (bonus time!).  You can read the complete review and see a promo video here at YMX.

What have you been up to so far this week?

Today was the end of my design contest at 99designs.  In all there were 74 different submissions from 28 designers over the 7 days, each working to represent the business I described to them.  If you click here you can see the winning design, and many of the others (some were withdrawn before the end).

The design I chose fit the fun and professional look I was hoping for. And I’m looking forward to putting it to use on cards, documents and a new website.  Thanks to all of you who shared your preferences and input with me!

I wasn’t happy with my own efforts at designing a logo for Verbitude, so I opted to take the job to 99designs, an online designer marketplace.  The process has been fun, and the quality (and number) of the submissions is fantastic!  But, it’s getting to the point that I’m going to need to make a decision.  If you want to give me input, go and take a look at what’s there (you can read the input, “the brief”, I gave the designers initially, as well as any back-and-forth with the individual designers by clicking on the thumbnails of the entries).  Leave a comment here about which you like best and why.

I’m hoping to be using this logo for a long time, and your input is important to me! Go here to look at my design page.

Wow, has it been a full week.  There have been a number of topics zooming by about which I said “I should blog about that” but I honestly haven’t had the concentrated time to flesh out the ideas.  I get stuck there sometimes, forgetting that blogging is not demanding perfection – nope, that would be something inside of me demanding that… grrr.

A few prayer requests:

• random health-related stuff seems to have crept up on us.  Several family members have populated the calendar with a number of doctor’s appointments.  Nothing big and scary, but lots of them.
• we’re starting to get close to Tim’s “move out” date!  There is plenty left to do with packing and getting a few items he still needs for the dorm, plus getting the final word on the financial aid situation.
• a friend who has been living with us for a little over 3 years is also preparing to move out.  It’s a good thing for her, but also a tad stressful.
• in a crazy thunderstorm yesterday water somehow got into the space between the first and second floors on the bedrooms side of the house (no pipes to leak) and drip into the living room.
• had a great meeting yesterday with a friend who is a candidate for a local municipalities open police chief position.  We talked about urban people/culture and needs, and some ways I’ve seen that the police can be a more positive entity while still doing their primary mission.  I’m praying he gets the job, though I did tell him I thought he was a little crazy for wanting it!
• my business has finished it’s first official month of existence!  It’s amazing how God has provided open doors and opportunities; I’m so grateful.
• we’re attending the wedding of a former student this weekend, and I’m really looking forward to celebrating with Ricky and Michele and their families.
• on Sunday we’re going to visit a church that we’re hoping Tim can get plugged into as his “college church.”
• and there are a ton of other friends and family members going through huge life changes.  God knows all the details, but I know that more prayers for things like adjusting to new jobs, moving, welcoming new family members and grieving the loss of some others are most welcome.

last week:

I confirmed yesterday that I’m going to participate in something pretty cool when I go to the National Youth Workers Convention, and it is worthy of a post all it’s own.  Watch for that soon.

‘Tis true.  YS is going crazy with interactive stuff for the NYWC (check out the website because they just keep adding more stuff), and one of the things I know about because I’m participating is they’ve recruited a team of bloggers to document the event live.  I’m pretty excited about that, as I’ve enjoyed blogging about the conventions I’ve attended previously, and it’s cool that YS is being intentional about covering a bunch of the seminars as well as the general sessions to add to the large number of attendees who will personally blog.  It will be interesting to see it all play out, and I’m excited to be part of the team making that happen for the Pittsburgh event.

But wait, there’s more to the “something pretty cool” and it’s the part I just confirmed last week (I’ve known about the live-blogging for a bit longer).  I’m going to be both blogging and participating in a brand new training event being offered before the convention called Real World Parents.  The best part, imo, is that RWP isn’t only a training event for me, but will give me the opportunity to present RWP seminars.  I love the concept of equipping parents and youth workers to about a child/student’s discipleship together in a syngergistic way. (it’s not a competition, really!)  It certainly answers a cry of my own heart as a parent and a youth worker to see the Kingdom grow within and around families.

What it’s about:

Real World Parents seminar …

• is a program that gives hope, vision, encouragement and practical skills for parents to help their families grow in Christ and accomplish his purpose for us on earth.
• is a program that will help your local church dynamically reach out to your community, and strengthen families in your church body.
• is designed to work in the Real World we live in and is not based on artificial or unrealistic spiritual goals.
• starts where you are as a family whether you are continuing a spiritual legacy or beginning one.
• can help your children develop Godly wisdom in their lives.
• can help your family become generous and loving in your community as you share the good news of Christ with others.

If a seminar like RWP sounds like something you would like to know more about hosting at your church (starting in Spring 2009), shoot me an email or leave a comment. You can explore more of the information about the seminar here on the RWP website. And, of course, you can stay tuned here for live blogging about the training itself.

See, I told you it was pretty cool!

Those of you who read this site via RSS won’t see any difference in posts coming to your reader or email inbox, but if you’re a surfer, you will.  Last night, in an additional apptempt to figure out why certain strange code behaviors are causing my content to be inserted in different places in the feed timeline than their actual post date, I changed the template hoping to get “fixed” code in the process.  We shall see.

In other news:

Yesterday saw the completion of the supplemental paperwork (again) for Tim’s college financial aid.  Now we wait and keep praying that there may be additional aid available to him.  We’re confident that God will provide, and we’re thankful that he already has in a receptive and helpful financial aid counselor.  I wish the process was simpler, I can imagine there are folks who have a far harder time with it than we have because of the complexity.

I’ve got some editing on writing projects of varying proportions on my task list that need completing.  It’s just a matter of carving out the space and receiving the grace to get them finished.  Working from your living room can be a little complicated like that.  In a few weeks, though, I’ll have the opportunity to claim a room in our home as an office.  Our friend who has been living with us (in that room) for the past 3 years is planning to move at the end of the month.  We’re happy for her in getting to that place, and we regain a room at just the right time.

I confirmed yesterday that I’m going to participate in something pretty cool when I go to the National Youth Workers Convention, and it is worthy of a post all it’s own.  Watch for that soon.

OK, time for another cup of coffee and to settle into some work space!